The Value in Impatience
So I wrote and essay for English 102 and I personally like so I thought I’d post it up here for everyone else to read. The focus of the paper had to be on some insight using something as a catalyst. So click on through for the full essay, works cited and all.
Fishing. The great outdoor sport. Age, gender, and ethnicity independent, fishing comes in different flavors: competetive, hobby, and survival. The latter of the three obviously being the less common. Myself in particular participated in fishing as a hobby. Inherited as a hobby from my father, nearly everything I know about fishing was taught from him except that which could not be taught but only experienced. He taught me the different lures, the two fishing styles of spin reel and fly fishing, but most of all he taught me the value of patience. Now he didn’t “teach me patience” but “taught me the value of patience.” Patience wasn’t one of those things that could be taught but had to be experienced and built. As a child this was difficult as sitting or standing in one place for any child can prove to be a difficult task. In time however I learned no fish was ever caught without some amount of patience.
As time went along I began to understand more about fishing and began to experiment some and do more of my own thing with it. My father—having been set in his ways for a good time now—did his own thing. Sometimes I would cast in unconventional ways and fish in areas where you wouldn’t think fish would like to hang out. More importantly I began to move more often up and down the river spending less time in a hole where I was getting no bites. What startled me the most was this constant moving often proved beneficial as I covered more of the river or stream and found the best holes and caught more fish. This led to me to think “Is patience really always the best practice?” Patience is not in fact a completely good trait but is a trait to be used in certain times and circumstances where proved to be the most beneficial.
“Patience is a virtue,” as my parents have always told me. Virtue being defined in the dictionary as as “the quality of doing what is right and avoiding what is wrong” or “patience and the virtues closely associated with it in the Christian tradition—hope, constancy, temperance, and perseverance” (Schiffhorst 1) . I do believe patience to be an admirable quality and will generally be beneficial to most situations. But in C.S. Lewis’ book Mere Christianity he speaks of morals and characteristics as being neither inheritantly good nor bad but rather related them to the keys of a piano—each key neither sounds good nor bad (11). It is how and when the keys are played that determines the quality of the sound or the morals to the characteristic. Patience is no exception to this. Patience can be used in a good way by practicing patience with a spouse whom may tend to be a bit stressful under certain situations. However patience with a spouse to change whom you know to be having many affairs would be unhealthy. While you continue to sit and wait for them to change they are still being unfaithful and inevitably causing you much grief and possibly frustration. To state that “patience is a virtue” would only be half right. For it to fit the definition of “doing what is right and avoiding what is wrong” might be correct under one condition but if it is not correct under all conditions then it cannot be universally true. This is much in the same way that scientist test to see if a theory stands true. A theory is shot down if it does not hold up if it fails under certain tests.
Patience for something good doesn’t necessarily keep it in the realm of being the right choice. Imagine if I tell you that I need some time to think about the situation before I make a decision. A full two months passes by and I still haven’t said a single thing on any decision. Do you remain patient? What if the decision is time imperative and a decision by the end of this second month is critical. You could remain patient and wait for the decision or you could give into impatience and insist upon making a decision. Clearly continuing to wait for a decision would run a high risk of a decision not being made and causing further issues. Impatience would have a decision one way or another and would thus avoid further conflict. Impatience in this situation led to a better outcome so would you say “impatience is a virtue?” No, of course you would not. For it is only a key to be played at the right time. If we prefer to look at it in a more euphemistic fashion we could look at it as a termination of the patience as opposed to labeling it as “impatience.”
Sometimes patience can spawn other less desirable traits such as laziness. It may seem like a long stretch to say this, but I’ve experienced this personally myself. After my parents had divorced, I lived with only my mother. My mother has never been one to be very strict in us doing our chores. She gave us chores yet she gave them in trust that we would get them done. However when we didn’t she was very patient with us. She would remind us of our responsibility and tell us to get it done. I will personally admit having pushed this line—see exactly how far she will go before I really have to do my chores. With me this spawned a habit of laziness and procrastination. I would put things off until the very latest and avoid doing things if I could. Not to say my mother’s methods of raising us were bad but had she been a little less patient and not let us push things so far I may not have formed these habits. An argument could be put up that it was my own fault to have created these habits. But would you really hold a child responsible for a the habits they begin to form? It is the parents responsibility to guide their children into forming healthy habits. It was my mother’s duty to demonstrate patience for us but in moderation. Moderation being the key because too much patience as she had and we take advantage of it; too little and we do chores out of fear of impatience and never learn patience by example. A piano key played too much becomes repetitious and obnoxious but a key that is underplayed may leave the song lacking.
In the end it is not patience which can be determined whether it is good or not. Instead we should judge whether it will result in a better outcome under the current situation by asking three separate question: 1) Is what I wait for good? 2) Will waiting give better results than not? 3) What will be the effects of being patient? Some may already do this subconsciously without ever realizing it. Something pops up and instinctively they run through what the pros and cons are of each decision. These three questions are just the main guiding questions to help observe the main aspects. Each situation is unique so naturally some may require less time to think about while others a great deal more time and a great many more questions.
The patience I have learned from both my father and my mother has taught me a great deal. But using patience at the right time has taught me the most. It is at times like this when we learn the most about something by experiencing the effects of not having it. Just as my father and mother taught me the value in patience so have I learned the value in impatience.
Works Cited
Lewis, C.S. Mere Christianity. New York: HarperCollins, 2001.
Schiffhorst, Gerald J. “Patience and the Education of Adam in “Paradise Lost””. South Atlantic Review, Vol. 49, No. 4. (Nov., 1984), pp. 55-63.
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