Chasity

I feel like such an idiot.

And I haven’t cried for a long time now.

And now it just won’t stop.

When will this be over?

So this year I have a few new things in mind:

1. Less drama (self explanitory, and I want less of it in every aspect of this school year)

2. Not being so paranoid

3. Good grades (that’s a given)

4. Finding what I’m good at.

5. Remembering what’s important (friends, family, God)

6. Keeping my promises (also will help the drama go away)

7. No getting involved with physco people.

8. No skipping.

9. Sleep, lots of sleep.

10. Having Fun!

Summer is over.
And it was great.
I wouldn’t change it all.
I’ll always look back
And remember it
For all it’s worth
So good bye summer
Until next year.

Ouch, I swallowed a rather big ice cube and its melting in my throat, cold!

Well… I’m in Boise now. In Sam’s dorm room. It’s weird to think that he’s going to college. It also feels like I’ve known him a lot longer than I actually have. Odd.

Within this summer I feel so much more older, grown up if you will. Cause I’m 16 now. I just got my license. And I’m dating a college guy. Plus with all this college stuff surrounding me, I can’t help but realize that someday (not too long from now) all of us will be going away to college and into the “real world.” That’s kind of a scary thought. It makes me home sick.

But yeah. I know that a lot of teens are always saying that they can’t wait to get out, but do they really know that? “It’s always greener on the other side.” But is it really? All these questions, and no answers to follow them.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m stilll looking forward to the day that I finally move out, but I can’t help but feel a little sick to my stomach at the same time.

Well… first off, I got my license yesterday!

I am so happy for that. Like I was jumping off the walls all day.

So yeah, then Sam took me out to celebrate. He took me to the Macaroni Grill in Boise. It was fun. Then he showed me his new place (his dorm room). That was fun. Then we went out for ice cream and whatnot.

Candice is headed back home on Monday. And I’ll miss her, but I know she’s looking foward to getting back to the big city. So Sunday night her and I are going to find something fun to do for a going away thing.
(Anyone is welcome to join us)

Yeah, so I said thank-you to my microwave this morning. Just out of nowhere, I think it’s a sign that I’m too polite. Weird.

Band has went pretty smoothly so far this year. I love my section (except for maybe one person). For the most part they we all get along and we all have fun. I think we need to bring back a level of fun into band. Not just work, ya know? I remember my freshmen year being so much fun. Then my sophomore year was miserable. I think we need the good times back.

But yeah, I got my license!

I get my drivers license tomorrow and I get my car registered! Yay!

Yes! I finally took my written test to get my license. I only missed 3 questions (which is pretty good considering I didn’t study). Now all I have to do is get ahold of one of the driving testers so I can take that test too!

As we should all know, marching band started up again this year. I have 3 new tenors! Yay! And they’re all guys! I like having guys back in the section, it makes things less dramatic slash hectic.

And I love being sections leader! It makes me feel more responsible. I feel more useful slash important cause I’m doing more than just being another body out on the field.

In other words, today has been a much better day than the past couple of them.

So this morning I got up to go to the DMV so I could take my written test. I had to wait in line for an hour! So I finally get up there and say “I need to take my written test.”

“Do you have your permit signed and an ID card?

“Uhh…. no.”

“Well then you can’t take it. Next!”

WHAT!?!?! I just waited in line for an hour for them to turn me away? Gosh dangit! That was a horrible way to start the day. Especially since I get to find some ID and get my permit signed and go back there tomorrow morning. Oh joy…

So then about an hour later I had to head into work. It was fine, just the usual stuff. Then out of nowhere I feel horrible. Like sick to my stomache I think I’m going to puke type of horrible. So only after 2 hours of working I had to go home. Bummer. Cause I could really use the money.

So I came home and laid down for awhile. Started to feel better. Then realized all the stuff that I needed to do today. After I started stressing the rollercoaster in my stomach started up again. I think the whole reason I’m not feeling good is becuase I’m so worried about everything. Between getting my license, being in marching band and school starting next week…. I was making myself sick.

Now I still feel a little sick. But I’m trying to calm myself down. I hope it works.

I hate my parents. They NEVER stop nagging. People always say that teenagers are the most difficult to deal with. YEAH RIGHT! Only because parents make it that way. Seriously. What’s the point in yelling before talking? What’s the point in placing blame rather than talking? What’s the point of me even being in this house with them if they don’t want me around? It doesn’t stop! I’m so sick of this. They’re making it sound like I’m such a heartache to them. That all they do is live for me. YEAH RIGHT! When was the last time they even cared about what I’m doing? They only talk to me if they’re upset. And they’re only upset if I just happen to bump into their life. Sorry mom and dad! But if you didn’t want to have kids then you should have used better birth control!